“We often abandon ourselves in an attempt to prevent other people from abandoning us.” “If you are trying to manage other people’s feelings, you are abandoning your own.” ~Joe Hudson Some problem’s are solution’s to deeper problems… For more on this topic consider the book The Drama of the Gifted Child
Category Archives: Relationship
Why do you look for a third thing?
“When you’ve done well and another has benefited by it, why like a fool do you look for a third thing on top—credit for the good deed or a favor in return?” ~Marcus Aurelius, Meditations, 7.73 “When you give to someone in need, don’t do as the hypocrites do—blowing trumpets in the synagogues and streets...
When you see anger… train yourself to look for pain.
https://youtube.com/shorts/R8oqlgWizG8?si=DYXv8hG6PLmI5pUH “Anger is often what pain looks like when it shows itself in public.” – Krista Tippett – Book: I Don’t Want to Talk About It: Overcoming the Secret Legacy of Male Depression by Terrence Real
Sometimes, the people you always thought would be there won’t…
but also people you never expected to be there will.
If it is important… it is today.
Paul M. Michaud MD, CPE Your problem is you think you have time. You can always wait until tomorrow… until you can’t. It is unlikely that tomorrow will be better than today, and often, that thing you are putting off does not get better with time… but worse. It is also possible that tomorrow may...
When a deep injury is done to us…
Paul M. Michaud MD, CPE Remember… sometimes the person you most need to forgive for inflicting that injury is yourself. Categories
If you want to change the world, start by changing your world…
Paul M. Michaud MD, CPE “Our capacity to destroy one another is matched by our capacity to heal one another. Restoring relationships and community is central to our well-being.” ~Bessel VanDerKolk Every interaction with someone offers a choice… Categories
Concept: Hanlon’s Razor (adapted)
Paul M. Michaud MD, CPE Hanlon’s Razor- Never attribute to malice that which can be adequately explained by stupidity or incompetence. Hanlon’s Razor (adapted)- Never attribute to malice that which can be adequately explained by _______. Often when I have seen behavior I do not understand, and particularly when I would see behavior I do...
Unspoken expectations…
Paul M. Michaud MD, CPE Sometimes, when people do not know what they need/want (or do not know how to advocate for their own needs/wants) they will relieve that psychological tension by finding someone else to blame for not knowing what they need/want. It may sound like this… “If you loved me you would know...
When you help someone out of a challenging situation…
Paul M. Michaud MD, CPE avoid the temptation to lecture in the immediate period that follows. Allow your actions, the way you live your life, to be the lesson. There will likely be a time for discussion in the future, but it’s rarely now. .. Categories